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I could feel you tiptoe around the bitter conversation.
I breathe in your narcissism.
I juggle your perfectionism and wind of chaos.
I could feel you dig your nails into my flesh.
I am starving for your disappearance.
I balance your chameleon charm and mirrors.
I could feel you drag your feet toward the open door.
I am constantly tasting your immaturity.
I adjust to your outbursts and drama.
I could feel you slipping through my fingertips.
I swallow the pill easily knowing you are no longer here.

by on

Forgive me if I speak the colors of truth
Forgive me if I stare into the painted sunset
Forgive me if I stand to close to the walls
Forgive me if I walk alone on the trails
Forgive me if I view myself as a whirlwind
Forgive me if I ramble in my head
Forgive me if I notice you don’t care
Forgive me if I see nothing in my future
Forgive me if I bottle up what you can’t see
Forgive me if I vent my frustrations to myself
Forgive me if I tell myself it will all be ok
Forgive me if I just keep to myself
Forgive me if I die and no one is at my funeral

by on

Should I care enough

to acknowledge your existence

Do I care enough

to reply back to your nonsense

Should I care enough

to slap that grin off your devious face

Do I care enough

to raise my palm toward an empty man

Should I care enough

to not leave you penniless

Do I care enough

to take you to court

Should I care enough

to walk away from you

Do I care enough

about myself to make a decision

Should I care enough

about myself to leave you

*Marie had asked me to use this title for a poem.

****

Please check out my books!

by on

So much anger

So much bottled

So much frustration

So much repeating

So much carelessness

So much distance

So much ignoring

So much venom

So much contained

So much lost

So much wasted

So much avoiding

So much gone

So much feared

So much vile

So much excrement

So much confusion

So much

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I can’t tell

If I’m lost

or if I’m just not found

I can’t tell

If I’m confused

or if I’m in a fog

I can’t tell

If I’m the enigma

or if I’m missing pieces

I can’t tell

If I’m scared of myself

or just want to be hidden

I can’t tell

If I’m in a movie

or my reality is dramatic

I can’t tell

if I’m an introvert

or I just enjoy being alone

I can’t tell

if I want to live

or if I’m content being alive

by on

I was born to feel

I was born to absorb my emotions a bit different

I want to see the world through others eyes

I was born to be a poet

I was born to be a writer

I want to be in touch with my tears

I want to know where they came from

I want to know where your scars came from

I want to understand you

I was born to be something I didn’t know existed

I was born to love you

I was born to share something that is suppose to bring us together

I was born to hold you

I was born so we could be together

I was born to love you until the end of time

by on

I’m a blurry train wreck
I’m the bottom of a pit
I’m the black ice in the winter
I’m the darkest rain cloud
I’m the sting from the bee
I’m a fading car crash
I’m the dust on the ground
I’m the tears in my lonely eyes
I’m a distant social disease
I’m the monster under my bed
I’m the skeleton in my closet
I’m the spider creating my own web
I’m the tarantula in the desert
I’m the demon in my soul

by on

I saw you between the kaleidoscopic tears and wretched veins. I kept my distance and harbored the burnt edges of my existence. I clashed with harmony and my own walls that I have personally built. I stand between your denial and my built up frustrations. I walk away to hold on to my sanity knowing my dreams will never come true. I live for you. I live for what I love not the picket fences you created. I always thought love was elastic.

****

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by on

You don’t need stunning

lipstick to make you sexy

You don’t need layers

of make up to make you beautiful

Just be real

You don’t need curves

to make you ravishing

You don’t need to perform

sexual acts to make you desirable

Just be honest

You don’t need to hide

all of the layers that make up you

Just be simply beautiful

***

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by on

Chasing a high-pitch shout

down an empty bottle

Retracing every convoluted

and mindless discussion

that was conjured up

Deciding not to dwell or

wallow in your demise

doesn’t change that I

can feel every chard of glass

down Broken Bottle Highway

You call yourself a lost soul

but parts of you just vanish

You claim to seek the answers

to the questions you already know

Along the path of stubbornness

Broken Bottle Highway

runs parallel to your demons

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I don’t measure myself by the dollar earned

I don’t measure myself by possessions

I don’t measure myself by the scars

I don’t measure myself by what I write

I don’t measure myself by the quantity of friends

I don’t measure myself by my beliefs

I don’t measure myself by who I know

I don’t measure myself by my fears

I don’t measure myself by my philosophies

I don’t measure myself by my tears

I just don’t measure myself

I am who I am

by on

Overflowing drops of sadness

crash the grounds of reality

Waves of anger and frustration

soar through every vein

Camouflaging the numbness

wakens the frozen memories

Slowly losing the crack of a smile

shades of grey and black entwine

A living ghost I am, alone—

all that is left of you

I talk in my sleep when I’m wide awake

In limbo I reach out to you,

my anchor in the fog

Overflowing mourning bellows

shattering the reflection in the mirror

Staring into the depths of your selfishness

stirring the darkest hurricanes

Consuming prescriptions of self-hatred

scream at your tarnished soul

Slowly your existence forever fades

whirlwinds of chaos downpour into your loved ones

A living ghost I am, alone—

evidence of your life

I keep together with special effects

And all I want is to touch you,


my anchor in the fog

Overflowing rain of melancholy

drip into the silence of your grave

Crumbled walls are now at your feet

as clouds hang over your torn shadow

Dwelling into your perfectionism

dismantles your steel cage

Slowly your wishes become true

Your actions speak a thousand poems

than the words you spoke alive

A living ghost I am no more—

I’ll breathe for me and you

Laugh for me and you, love for me and you

But still, I want to hold you tight,


my anchor in the fog

B.M. – Non italics parts

K.A – Italic Part

Collaboration of Braeden Michaels & Kindra M. Austin

Poemsandparagraphs.wordpress.com

I enjoyed collaborating with Kindra. It was easy. Her writing is real, raw, and honest to the core. Check out her blog.

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I scratched my itch

I packed my bags

I didn’t laugh

I couldn’t say a word

They were already said

I held in the jungle

I swallowed my confusion

I didn’t see the condition

I couldn’t see the barriers

They were already built

I walked away from the illusion

I quietly closed the door

I saw a new found path

They were always there

I just ignored them

****

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Your deepest scars

don’t define who you are

Your deepest scars

walk away from the sunset

Your deepest scars

don’t stare into the light

Your deepest scars

hide behind the plum tree

Your deepest scars

don’t scream at the rage

Your deepest scars

have burnt everlasting edges

Your deepest scars

don’t speak in front of millions

Your deepest scars

never fade in the chapter

Your deepest scars

don’t disappear in the journey

Your deepest scars

shape your colorful soul

Your deepest scars

make you gorgeous

by on

Injecting balladry

like it’s a antiseptic

Using your tiny

carry on thesaurus

to captivate the innocent

Swallowing cups of caffeine

to fill a concave

wretched black heart

Drunken saliva dripping

down your male oversized chin

Sunken and carved out

slurping the Devil’s wine

Casting judgement

from an empty phantom

A mindless hippocrate

Not realizing you are

an uneducated stalker

by on

I saw vibrating rainbows draped over a slippery moon. I saw glitter on 20 x 20 frames. I could hear the grand piano playing in the deserted mountains. I saw a glimpse of red in the clouds of rage. I saw rivers of champagne. I witnessed sorrow hiding deep into the caves. I saw the sun bellow. I saw bouquets of silence seek Cupid’s harp. I fell into the well creeping behind the parade of jesters. I saw the edges of souls bleed tears of joy. I saw emptiness screech. I felt the warmth of diamond shaped hearts. I found a bottle of spilled ink and the words were never ending. I heard trumpets around the bend. I saw blank pages but words rattled and spoke like gospel. I discovered the path of humanity. I caressed the gentleness of others. I climbed into the vortex of raw emotions. I felt the infinite words in ink overflow within myself.